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UPDATE!!   
08:51pm 02/10/2007
  I've just picked up my visa for vietnam. I skate like a monster. I'm sorta working things out so i can work (il)legally in the country. I may be moving to Austrailia. I'm dating an AMAZING canadian girl.. levi and raili are coming soon. I play SERIOUS metalcore on my shit $50 taiwanese acoustic.. my mother is mailing me the lizard king.. starting an 80's hair metal cover band(maybe)still lookin' for the drummer..


oh and my beard is all gone. .. i'll post up some pictures soon..

or at the end of the week.. my camera is in the shop.. fuckin'a
 
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UPDATE!!   
05:08pm 21/02/2007
  so i'm really starting to hate taiwanese people. No joke, it seems the more taiwanese people i meet the more and more i can't stand them. Its funny to that a people who is so intelligent can have NO COMMON SENSE WHATSOFUCKING EVER!!

Anyway, aside from being are ridiculous idiots all the time things are going relatively smooth right now. I mean, yeah i may have to get myself deported from Taiwan at the end of the month but then again maybe not. I've just got to wait and see.

Its the new Chinese year. The year of the pig, my year too. So i've been studying chinese a little more and yeah its getting better but still nowhere near where i'd like it to be. I can read and write a little, its fucking ROUGH. I've got all the basics down, and i'm still looking for a school that is still up and running.

Once upon a time it was that you could come out here and go into a language school and get an ARC. Alien Residency Card, which basically meant that you were a sorta-citizen, and you didn't have to go on visa runs or be without medical care. So many people did this though that the government put a stop to it. Canadians and south africans were overrunning taiwan. Now you've gotta get into a University affiliated school and pay a ton of money to get an ARC which stopped most people. The problem is that there are some of us, who want to just learn chinese and are already scamming the government and don't NEED an arc.. so all the schools don't have enough students to hire teachers to teach them. Its whack..

I've started a new workout routine. Matt and are racing to see who can qualify for the special forces first. It turns out that you need to be able to do 85 push ups in two minutes, 90 sit ups, 13 pull ups, and run 5 miles in 40 minutes. So yesterday we changed things up and fuck.. its so rough. I was able to get to 61 pushups, and instead of running we went and climbed a mountain. Monkey Mountian, no joke thats the name. We drove up into the jungle and found this awesome motorcycle road and took that for a bit. Its funny cuz we parked at this temple and found that there was a Bagua Zhang shrine there. Bagua is one of the Taoist martial arts we're studying. Well i don't do it, Matt does, I do Xing yi. We found this little trail that led up to the top of the mountain but it wasn't really a walking path, we had to use all these ropes to scale this crazy rock ledges and faces. Heather, you'd be proud of me..

When we got to the top we were literally in the clouds. All this white mist was around us and we couldn't see anything. We got some pictures and one of these days i'll get around to posting some of my many adventures here in Asia. At the top we smoked a bit of hash and had to make the trek back down.. so fucking scary..

Aside from mad adventures, studying chinese and trying to start fights with matt, Taiwan is a really lonely place. I mean, i chose to live in a place where nobody spoke english, but what i didn't really take into consideration was how much i would miss human contact. I mean out here, people don't touch, at all. Its freaky. And to most taiwanese women i am fucking SCARY. Tall, burly, long hair, beard, tattoes and white. To them i am a criminal. It was really funny at first, seeing women hide there children from me as i walked by, but now its just getting kinda old. All the staring that people do. I have started to reinstate my Gaijin powers. I use the Gaijin Optic Blast on people all the time. When they stare, i stare back and make the meanest face i can until they look away..

i'm an asshole i'm a fucking wanker. i know i know.. but damn it gets old.

New tattoes, more language, getting in shape and really reevaluating what is important to me. I keep wanting to shave my fucking head too.. jeezus even britney spears could do that.. wtf is wrong with me?

I hate taiwanese women, and i love you guys.. fuckin'a
 
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UPDATE   
11:38pm 11/01/2007
  So i'm getting platinum teeth.. well.. platinum tooth..


i'm gonna have bling


also, i took a trip to kowloon.. fuckin'a it was nuts..

i ended up running into these two exmilitary soldier guys. they were staying at the same hotel i was so we were gonna go back and drink some beers.. when we get back to the hotel there was this crazy riot going on at the entrance.. police and police dogs, ambulances.. the whole works..

okay riot is kinda big.. it was really just like 20 guys fighting..

and i *think* somebody may have gotten stabbed...


unfortunately Odin decieded not to place me in battle. .

anyway, life is silly..
 
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UPDATE!!   
12:48pm 03/01/2007
  my foot is broken
motorcycle crashed(fucking idiot taiwanese drivers)
root canal on christmas
drank snake blood/venom/bile(by the way, venom gets you a little high)
directing a shakespear play for my fifth graders, my FIFTH GRADE TAIWANESE students who can barely speak english.. its rocks!
its been a month and a half, still the adsl people haven't installed my interenet
i'm leaving for china tomorrow, gonna kick it in kowloon and hong kong
decided to stop drinking as long as matt does.. we'll see how it lasts..
cut ten inches off my hair.. its all healthy now, fuckin' wierd..
my chinese is getting a bit better.. i'm like chapter five WOOT!
crashed a rooftop party on new years, saw the taipei 101 fireworks, i think my friend jen got stitches..
and some gay white guy tried to start shit with me on the behalf of a good friend of mine.. a friend who didn't care when i said, "I don't like your face." .. .. Thats it.. thats the story, thats what i said and he got all butthurt and wanted to throw down.. it was SO funny..
like anybody could fuck with the craziest motherfucker in this country..

rawr!

WO BUXI HUAN ZHANADA REN!

i don't like canadians..
 
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what the fuck   
02:10pm 15/11/2006
  why does livejournal suck so much ass?!

is it all different for everybody or what? i can't read most of the characters anyway, but the new layout is crap.. live journal must burn..

also, i'm in taiwan.. i took a trip to hong kong which was great.. also next weekend matt and i are going on a scooter tour of southern taiwan.. hopefully we'll be able to surf in hualien.. anyway, what the fuck is up hippies?
 
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UPDATE!!   
09:13pm 24/08/2006
 
mood: amused
so my eye migraines came back yesterday. I've been stressing like a muthafucka. I'm getting the boot from my apartment and am super short on cash AND AND i wasn't going to be able to make my visa run flight..

i was teaching a class right before i was going to leave and i dunno if it was stress or just not eating but i lost the vision in my right eye..

it happens sometimes, i'll get really dizzy trying to find my way around. I feel like i could just throw up.. i had to find a local teacher to cover my class while i chilled out for a bit. They looked at me like i was fucking nuts when i told them what happened. "oh can you watch my class, i've lost my vision and now i'm going to throw up." hahahaha.. its cool though, turns out one of the scottish kids i work with, his dad had them too. All he said was when it happens again(and it will) just relax and keep your eyes closed for a bit and eat something.

NOW FOR THE GOOD NEWS!!


my job MAY be getting me an apartment really close to the school totally furnished which is great. I talked to the boss of the foriegn teachers today to see if i could get an advance on my pay(they don't pay you until your first six weeks are up) so i can make my visa run flight and find a place to live. He was like, yeah sure totally.. how soon can you move in? i just sat there looking at him like, wtf?! i told him that i could move in whenever considering moving for me right now means grabbing my one suitcase and my duffle bag and walking into an apartment..

so things have started looking up again. i'm .. .. something right now..



THE JEEZUS!
 
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UPDATE!!   
09:08pm 19/08/2006
  so i've been in taiwan for a while now.. i work at this really great school in Xindian city its just across the river from Taipei.
I am the home room teacher for Tomato class. These kids are so awesome. They all get english names when they come to the school. They have wierd names too, there were two boys called, "Legolas," and "Aragorn." I teach a little girl named Apple and one of the boy's names is Balance.

Anyway, i recommend everybody travel. Its so fucking exciting and dangerous and evil. I love it. So far i'm about to lose my apartment. I think i'll go live in the hostel for a few months. I'll have the chance to be around more white people who know the area a bit better.

I'm also trying to talk my boy Levi into moving out here in a few months. So far it looks like he's going to try to move out here in March. He is sick and tired of the Shoj and needs to get out of Eugene. His new girlfriend is going to be doing some traveling when she graduates college in june. So when she gets out here we're all going to be travel buddies.

Next month i go on my first Visa run. I'm thinking of going to the Phillippinnes instead of Hong Kong. Its going to be a lot less expensive and well.. hong kong kinda freaks me out.

Well.. i'm just rambling. Anyway, i love you bitches.. except you know.. the ones i hate..
 
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well bitches..   
10:22am 08/04/2006
  hey fuckers i'm leaving tonight after work, i'll be gone all week..  
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bitches the whole lot of them! arg!   
11:13pm 04/04/2006
  of all the fucked up things to ask of me..  
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well..   
10:20am 04/04/2006
  man i'm so stressing.. i'm having trouble sleeping too. fuck man! who would have thought uprooting yourself and moving 1000 miles away, changing jobs and life styles would make a guy freak out so much?  
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you're all jealous..   
10:52am 27/03/2006
  things are decent.. i'll revel, for a moment.. soon, once i get a replacement, i'm gone..  
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why is it..   
08:38pm 26/03/2006
  everytime i sneeze.. i also pee a little in my pants..  
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going on 15..   
11:04pm 09/03/2006
  so.. i'm going to get a day off on saturday.. i'm very excited about it.. oh and FUCK YOU!! i'm so sick and tired of your shit! who the fuck do you think you are? huh?! why don't you just fucking tell me so i don't have to guess anymore.. are we friends not friends fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck  
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bah!   
01:02pm 06/03/2006
  i'm sad.. and lonely.. but it only gets worse when i'm kept busy.. i have no love right now, there are some of you who try, but really we know it isn't the same..  
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12:29pm 06/02/2006
  okay.. so.. guitars and recording.. blonde girls and parties.. superbowl winnings beers.. still wonderful  
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mmm   
03:25am 31/01/2006
 
mood: restless
scotch is good.. drink scotch.. love it.. learn from it... and sometimes just really fuckin' masturbate
 
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eh..   
01:05pm 27/01/2006
 
mood: angry
i still can't feel my fucking arm!!
 
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numb   
11:35am 25/01/2006
 
mood: contemplative
so.. the school thing went really well.. i was surprised how fast three hours went by.. i think i'm going to go back there next term and do it again. it was a lot more fun than i thought it would be. Miho told me when we went out to lunch that all the kids really liked me and i was a natural. she said most people get really nervous around the kids.. it was so funny too, because i guess she has told her students a bunch about me already, so when i was introduced so many of them were like, "YOU'RE death metal dave?!" the man, the myth, the legend.. hehe.. anyway it made me feel really good.. i guess greg and miho were talking about me too.. greg teaches at south while miho teaches at north and they both think i'd be a really good teacher.. she said that if a job opened up in the culinary department that they would both have my back and recommend me.. ME a fucking hich school teacher.. haha.. i'm not ready for that just yet but i would really consider it once i chill out a little bit.. so it was a good day yesterday, until i got home.. and realized that my right elbow and wrist were numb.. i don't know how it happened but i think i pinched a nerve and i'm STILL not fully recovered from the show.. my neck and back, shoulders and all my fist pumping muscles are so sore.. i'm getting old.. if i have to give up metal shows cuz i'm too old, i'll just die.. die..
 
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eh..   
03:25am 11/01/2006
  so.. i had a dream about my dead brother last night.. was really wierd.. going to see nile again.. too many people, too much love.. not enought of me to go around.. fuck  
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fuck   
06:24am 08/01/2006
  anxiety.. sleeplessness.. hate.. rage.. fuck.. fuck the winter. stop loving me.. seriously.. i hate you  
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